Confusing Communication and a New Obsession

Since having Audrey, almost 2 years ago, I have learned a lot. A whole lot. I mean, A WHOLE FREAKING LOT. Before I got pregnant, and during the whole nine months of carrying her, I worried that I would be clueless. I worried that I wouldn't know what to do, or how to take care of her; I worried that - not that I'd be a terrible mom - but that I would be clueless and, therefore, just not a very good mom.

Then I had her.

And I found out that so much of motherhood feels very instinctual and natural to me. When your love for your child combines with basic common sense, there aren't too many hurdles that are insurmountable.

One of the current hurdles we are facing has to do with our communication skills. Adam and I do pretty well. It's with Audrey that there is some confusion. Namely, toddler speak. It's the language toddlers speak right before they can actually speak English (or their native tongue, whatever that may be - in our house it's definitely English). You know you've heard this language before - if you haven't been around very many young kids you hear this language and you think, "What interesting sounds that kid can make" until that kid's parent responds with "No, we're not going to go the park until after lunch." And you wonder how that parent got that the kid wanted to go to a park when all you heard were funny sounds, none of which even remotely sounded like park. I remember thinking those same things with my nieces and nephews - and I remember being worried that I wouldn't understand my own children. But surprisingly, I do pretty well. Audrey is repeating everything we say these days and her vocabulary is expanding at a tremendous rate. And I've turned into one of those moms that is able to have a conversation in two languages: English and toddler speak. I'm bilingual. Go figure!

Well, lately there's been a little confusion. See, Audrey calls me Mama or Mommy (depending on her emotional state). Then there's Adam's mom who we refer to as "Grammy" - in toddler speak this sounds more like Mimi. My mom is grandma which sounds like MAma with the emphasis on the first Ma instead of the second. So, sometimes it's difficult to decipher who she is talking about - is it MaMA, Mimi, Mommy or MAma? You see how that might get tangled? Now, there's another "person" that Audrey wants to see a lot of and in toddler speak it sounds like "Mermy". Any guesses as to who this might be?



I won't leave you hanging....



When Audrey says "Mermy" she wants to see... The Little Mermaid.

And this is the smile I get when she "asks" to see her and I am able to successfully translate:



She is officially obsessed with The Little Mermaid. She loves the part when Ursula is taking Ariel's voice and Ariel has to sing. Loves the singing part. She has the first few notes down and sings with it. She also really likes "Part of your World". And she loves dancing around during "Under the Sea". But she really just likes all of it. The whole thing. It was pretty cute. After seeing it for the third time today, I can safely say that I may be getting sick of it. I try running interference with other activities, but it doesn't last long before Audrey is insisting on "Mermy.... Mermy.... Mermy... Mermy.. MERMY, MERMY, MERMY!


MOMMY, MERMY!


And then, inevitably it seems, I fold. And I put it on (again). And then she does this:



...and frankly, with a smile like that and such a charming personality to go with it, I don't think I should be held accountable for my actions. I challenge anyone to respond differently.

The kid just has a way... hopefully I can develop my own "way" before she's a teenager, otherwise we're in trouble!

It's a Mystery

I don't think you can tell from the pictures, but my son's eye color is strange. I can't tell what color they will be and it's driving me crazy! In pictures they seem pretty dark in color - like they'll develop to be brown. But in person they are a mystery. I have spent countless hours looking at them trying to figure out what color they are going to be. Since Adam has big, beautiful brown eyes I kind of took it for granted that all of our kids would probably end up with his color eyes. And judging by Audrey's incomparably beautiful eyes, I am ok with that! Aren't they simply stunning?!



And holy eye lashes!



I was always not-so-secretly covetous of Adam's long, long, thick, black lashes. Why does it always seem like the most beautiful lashes are on men - and they don't even care! I'm glad my girl inherited her father's lashes! Unfortunately, Luke inherited mine - but that's ok because he won't care!

Like Mother, Like Daughter

Anyone who knows me knows that I love books. I love to read! And while I would prefer it if the book is well-written and engaging - I'm not really that picky about what I read. There is no one genre of books that I prefer over the rest, though I tend to be drawn to stories that are more realistic - every once in a while I can enjoy a book that has elements that are fantastical or fictitious. I used to be a very avid reader. Growing up, I remember anytime there was a break of any sort - summer, Christmas, Spring Break, a three day weekend, etc. - I would fill all of my free time reading. I still love to read, but it's sometimes hard to find the time... but when I do find the time, reading is still my number one choice for leisure activities.

My husband, Adam, can attest to that. He dreads it when I start a good book - because it feels like his wife has been kidnapped. Adam has had a hard time understanding my love of reading - like many people, the only time he chooses to read is for some sort of assignment. Reading for fun is an oxy moron.

Until now.

See, a few months ago we watched a movie together and Adam really enjoyed it. And since I had read the book that the movie was based on, I was able to fill in some of the pieces of the book that the movie had left out. This movie really made an impression on him - and the parts that I had told him about that were missing or hadn't been explained well enough intrigued him. He kept asking questions, wanting more details so I told him to read the book. That did not appeal to him. He just wanted me to tell him everything that happened in the book, so I suggested that we read the book together. So we did - every night after we put Audrey to bed, he would read a chapter of scripture and then I would read a chapter from the novel. I think we were both surprised at how much this quiet time spent reading together meant to us. We both started to look forward to it. And we had fortune on our side because that one book was just the first in a series of four novels. A few nights ago we finished the last book in the series. I've loved sharing my love of reading with him. And it's been fun to watch him enjoying the stories and looking forward to what's going to happen next.

It's made me excited for the day when Audrey is old enough to read actual novels. For now, we are deeply entrenched in Dr. Seuss and Shel Silverstein - which is great fun! Audrey loves books! She loves being read to - over and over and over and over and over again! She also loves just "reading" them herself.







I will often find her sitting with an open book on her lap, flipping the pages, looking at pictures - and with how many times she's heard the stories, I bet it's not hard for her to remember which part goes with which picture. She's a smart kid.





She's also a too-cute-for-her-own-good kid!

PS - anyone read anything good lately?

New Roles

Since Lucas came into the world three weeks ago, we all have added at least one new role to each of our lives - I'm a mom of two, Adam is a dad of two, and Audrey is a big sister. We are all adjusting and trying to get used to what these new roles mean to us individually and also what they mean to our family as a whole. I am loving having Lucas in our lives. He is such a good baby. He is nursing well, he is sleeping well, he is pooping and peeing well - all the things a newborn should be doing, he's doing. Except maybe he's sleeping longer and not crying as much... and you will not hear me complain about either! I feel very blessed.

Of all of us, adjusting to our new roles, he is probably handling everything with the most grace. Maybe the secret lies in how much sleep he gets...






Or maybe the secret is that his dreams are so pleasant...



I wish I knew what was going through his mind. I wish I knew what he thought of everything in this new world. He has been such a wonderful addition. It's already hard to remember what life was like before him!

In the weeks and months before his birth, the thing that I was the most nervous or anxious about was how Audrey would handle having a new little baby in the house. I knew that she wasn't really understanding me when I would tell her that the big bump on mommy's belly was actually her growing brother. I knew it would be a big adjustment for everyone, but especially for her because she really didn't understand to be able to prepare herself for the adjustment. I was worried about her. Would she feel displaced? Would she feel jealous? Would she be excited? Would she want to play with him? Would she love him instantly? I knew it would likely be a mixture of all of these at different times. But the thing that I worried about the most was what I would do about it. How would I help her deal with all of these emotions (and the ones I didn't anticipate) and make her feel just as loved as always? How could I help her understand that this new little addition didn't subtract at all from my love for her?

I haven't found any definitive answers. I'm still working on it. Some days Audrey is really easy going and eager to play and be read to and she wants to interact with Lucas. She seems confident and is ok when I am holding or nursing Lucas. On others, she's a little more clingy with me - she seems to feel a little insecure about our relationship. For instance, if I need to nurse Lucas, she wants to be cuddled right next to me too, or she throws a fit because she wants me to put him down and hold her. Like I said, I'm still working on it. I try to make a conscious effort to make sure that when Lucas is sleeping I am getting some good quality Audrey-Mom time so that when I need to take care of Lucas, Audrey will be more likely to feel ok and not get jealous or insecure.

One thing I am happy for is that Audrey really does seem to love Lucas already. Whenever she sees him she whispers "Baby" and points to him and smiles. A few days after we got home from the hospital, I was nursing him and Audrey was sitting next to me. She kept patting her lap and looking at the baby, so I asked her if she wanted to hold him. She smiled really big, so after I finished feeding him, I set his bum in her lap while still supporting his torso and head. And she loved it!





I am really excited to see how their relationship develops as they both get older. It'll be fun to watch, as Lucas grows and develops, and see them actually start to play together and interact. I'm thinking that Audrey will be a wonderful big sister.



What do you think?

Lucas Collins Christian

This is him. Lucas Collins Christian. The newest addition to our wee clan. This picture was taken this morning - he's starting to check things out a little more, taking a few more peeks between all of the naps and meals. As with most newborns, he spends most of his time sleeping:







I can't blame him. I love naps too!



Everything with his delivery went well. We had a scheduled C Section - since Audrey came that way, that's what the doctors recommended - on Tuesday, July 21. The only hitch was the initial administration of the spinal didn't work, so I had to have an additional dose - but it all worked out after that. I even got to watch this time. They set up an angled mirror so I could see what was happening while it was happening. It was nice to feel more connected to the process. It was pretty amazing. And so is Lucas.



Or Luke. Whichever. We like Lucas. We like Luke. We hope he does too!

Just a Glimpse

Life is full of lessons. Love. Loss. Loneliness. Grief. Perseverance. Faith.

On this day last year, I was blessed to witness the birth of two of my nieces - twin girls. They came much too soon, though, and could not stay. Even though they were only permitted to stay a short time, I will never forget the feelings and impressions I had in that hospital room. I felt their sweet spirits. I felt their strength and their love. I felt the love of their parents and the ineffable and immeasurable amount of courage it took to hold and love their girls for the brief time they were allowed. I have since been awed and amazed by the faith that has been required to get through some really tough days since their passing.

I really have no words to describe all of the feelings in my heart today. But I wanted to do something for my sweet, angel nieces. I love them. I look forward to the day when I will get to wrap my arms around them and get to know them and be their favorite aunt.

I stumbled upon a song that seemed to have some of the feelings I am feeling today:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=doaHIOXIhH0


I love you, Megan and Marc, Elliana and Emmaline! You are always in my thoughts and prayers. And that's especially true today.

Fifth of July Heroics

This year's Fourth of July was so much fun because Audrey is now old enough to really appreciate sparklers and firework fountains. We started our evening with some great homemade burgers - the works: juicy hamburgers, cheese, grilled onions, lettuce, tomato, and Adam's delicious sauteed mushrooms - YUM! I made potato salad, and we had cantaloupe and had some limeade to top off the meal - which we ate in the shade of our huge wisteria tree. It was a really nice meal for our family, made that much nicer by having my parents here visiting, and Adam's mom and brother also stopped by to join in the festivities.

After dinner we lit some sparklers and a few small firework fountains - all of which Audrey loved.



She laughed and applauded and said "ooooohhhhh" a lot. It definitely didn't hurt that she could share her excitement and enthusiasm with her Grandmas...






and one of her Grandpas...



and of course, Adam makes everything fun for Audrey.



But the real excitement of the night didn't start until after the Fourth of July became the fifth of July. I woke up at 4am to Audrey just starting to cry - an occurrence which has thankfully become pretty rare since adjusting to her new bed. I slowly sat up on the side of the bed and my eye was caught by a strange glowing outside one of our bedroom windows. I stood and parted the curtains to see what the glowing was and discovered that the garbage can of one of our neighbors was on fire! I wasn't sure I could trust my sleepy eyes - I blinked a few times and looked all around to make sure it was what it looked like and then woke Adam. He instantly called 911 and reported the situation. I got Audrey and we all watched out the window as the fire spread from one garbage can to the other two cans next to it. Two big fire trucks showed up just as the siding on the carport shed began to warp and buckle from the heat of the approaching fire. We anxiously watched as the firemen extinguished the fire. We were so relieved that the destruction was confined to their trash cans and what looks to be very minimal damage to the siding on their shed. And this was thanks to Audrey - I would not have discovered the fire had she not woken me when she did. The timing couldn't have been tighter! She's our little hero today!